Happy Mother's Day

After last Mother's Day, I vowed that I wouldn't have any expectations for the day.  I don't know why I do it, but I always think it's going to be a fabulous day filled with breakfast in bed, gifts, flowers, a spotless house, no bugging or teasing, and lovely cards filled with all the reasons my children love me.  When in fact, it turns out to be similiar to other days and I question my own worth as a mother.

Today was a different Mother's Day though.  We spent it on the road in our two cars.  His and hers.  It's getting old.  It's weird being somewhere and feeling like you're nowhere on what should be a special day.   Actually it was.  I was with my mother for a little bit of it.   Anyway...we got home tonight after not eating all day and the kids dug out corn dogs while I ate a few bites of my Nothing Bundt Cake that D  had gotten for me.  Too bad the staff at his office saw it in the fridge there and ate a fourth of it.  I wasn't too happy about that!  Trust me on that one. 

The kids presented me with gifts.  Gifts where you fake like you're happy.  Those kind.  I had to keep reminding myself that anything was good when I wasn't expecting much in the first place. 

Throughout the day I had been taking our anual Mother's Day pictures with each of the kids.  It had been frustrating.  I had wanted really good pictures in neat locations but the wind was crazy today so I had Medusa hair in several pictures.  Some were taken at the church.  Lame.  Others by the front door.  Some kids wouldn't cooperate.  And the list goes on and on.  So I was down about that. 

But...as I got looking at the pictures we had taken throughout the day, I noticed myself smiling.  It didn't take long to remember the fun we had had trying to get the pictures.  I could see that I really love and enjoy my children.  That I have found joy in the journey of being their mother.  That's something that you can't fake, pretend, buy or even photoshop! 

I'm going to bed happy on Mother's Day.  Happy that I'm a mother and happy that my mother is back.  Happy that Mother's Day can consist of corn dogs for dinner, receiving only 3/4 of a cake, his and hers cars full of children, windy pictures and a sink of dirty dishes.  Being a mom is what made me happy today.  Realizing that I'm a good mom.  Not comparing myself to other moms.  Doing the best that I can in my own way.  Makes me excited to be a mother every day.

And the "A ha" moment of the day...don't expect my kids not to be my kids just like I wouldn't want them to want me to be any different than I am.  Did you get that?  We're all good just the way we are.  When I look at it that way, I love their gifts and they really do make me smile.  I loved riding home while A drove.  It was a lot of fun.  I appreciate the homemade tortilla chips that A made me since we had no chips and a gallon and a half of homemade salsa.  I appreciated the generic school gifts that were given to me.  My kids didn't have to do any of those things, but they did in their own way.  Just takes looking at things through different eyes.

Happy Mother's Day!