So, the bishopric paid me a visit a week and a half ago. Just two minutes before they knocked on my door, D thought I might be asked to serve in nursery. I quickly told him that I'd have to "up" my medication if they did. I wasn't joking!
I sat there nervous on my couch anticipating the call. As soon as I heard the bishop tell his counselor that he would ask me, my heart sank. I knew that D was right. I was then asked if I would serve in the nursery.
My nervous giggle came out. But so did my good hubby. He was practically begging for the calling knowing how much I didn't want it. I accepted the call like I was taught. That was hard.
As soon as I said good bye, I raced up stairs and threw myself on my bed. D wasn't far behind me. He then laid on the bed and wanted to talk about it. The more he said, the worse it got. I was full of 101 excuses as to why I was wrong for the calling. He was being very cute with me but I was in NO mood to discuss my twelve month sentence. I just needed to cry and pout for a night.
The next morning I knew I needed an attitude change. Somehow I did it. I decided that I could do it. I told myself that I would walk right in and welcome all those young children into nursery.
I was sustained today.
I walked into nursery with my new found attitude ready to embrace the young children.
I stood there like a deer in headlights as the children were dropped off one by one! I heard a child cry and my eyes filled with tears. It took everything I had not to let my tears run down my face. D peeked his cute face in and asked if I was okay. I shook my head and said, "no". Oh how I wanted to run out of there sobbing. The tears were right there ready to go. D told me that I'd be okay. I didn't believe him, but I knew I needed to hang in there.
I did it. Probably not very well. But I did it. I survived.
As we were pulling out of the parking lot, D asked me what my favorite part of nursery was today. All I could say was, "One marble gone. Only fifty one marbles left." That came from a talk today that was REALLY good. He actually mentioned two of my faithful thoughts and then mentioned "be of good cheer" that I had discussed with a good friend just days ago. I was very emotional throughout his talk. He did mention a man that figured he had about twenty years to live. He decided to live a fuller life rather than focusing on things. So, he had a jar of 1000 marbles representing 1000 weeks to live. Each Saturday he would take out a marble. That's where my whole marble thought came from.
I know that I won't always look at my calling like marbles. But for today, it was tough and it was just a marble.
I'll get there. I can learn to love those kids just as others love mine.
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6 comments:
you need to give your aunt janny a call. she was just saying yesterday how much she LOVED that calling and wanted to go back. for real.
Erin's right, I love that calling. Check your facebook where I left you a note. You can do all things with the Lord. And that means nursery too!
I have to admit that I'd be right where you are if I got called to the nursery. I'd accept, and I'd try hard, but it would be a stretch, a leap, and totally out of my comfort zone!
About the marbles... You actually only had 48 marbles to start! Don't forget General Conference and Stake Conference!!! So now you are down to 47.
(I'm just saying...)
Good Luck!
I know how you feel, I taught sunbeams this summer, and I swore I was never going to have kids. I also got a new calling yesterday, and it's something I'm not big into doing, but like you I will try to move forward with faith. :) good luck
I've never served in nursery but heard it's the greatest. Take off your shoes, sit on the floor, and eat snacks. Only sundays so that's good, plus you LOVE children so you'll be a pro. Somedays I wish that was my calling!
T.O.-
I bawled when I got called back to Primary too. In fact, I told Bishop that's why I didn't have children yet was because I had been in Primary for the last four year. I am nine months into the calling and honestly, I don't quite love the kids all the way yet... there are good and bad days and there are more good than bad. Mostly I think it's just because I don't want to love them. I am sure when I open my heart the calling will be good. I know all my cousins are going to think less of me, but I'm here to tell you of my reality. You always share your reality so here's a peice of mine. It's going to be okay if it takes you a few months to like and to even love the children. Good Luck, and don't forget it takes prayer.
Beth
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